Total pages in book: 45
Estimated words: 43870 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 219(@200wpm)___ 175(@250wpm)___ 146(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 43870 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 219(@200wpm)___ 175(@250wpm)___ 146(@300wpm)
“I’ll eat one. You eat the other,” I said, handing him the plate.
He smiled, took the cookie, and tapped it against mine. “Merry Christmas.”
“Merry Christmas.” I kissed his temple and studied the tree.
It wasn’t a particularly grand tree, to be honest. It had a bald spot on one side and the top drooped to the left. And since Phee had done the bulk of the decorating, most of the ornaments were located on the lowest branches. Somehow, that made it all the more charming.
I added this moment to the memory book. And another when Tanner was curled beside me naked in my bed.
I traced the notches of his spine and kissed his shoulder as he slept. My heart swelled in my chest a la the Grinch. It stole my breath and made my eyes sting. I noted his every detail—the curl of his eyelashes, the shadowy growth of beard on his strong jaw, the soft whoosh of air from his parted lips. His nose twitched in his sleep and it was really fucking cute, and I was—
Fuck me. I was in love with him.
I was head over heels in love with this cowboy.
I rolled onto my back and stared at the ceiling, a lone tear leaking from the corner of my eye.
What had I done?
CHAPTER 15
TANNER
Iwoke in the middle of the night, panicky and disoriented. Axel stirred in his sleep, immediately anchoring me. It was Christmas Day. Lila and Gordy were with Jax, Hazel’s calf had been delivered safely, presents were wrapped under the tree—except one.
My eyes adjusted in the dark well enough to make out the curve of Axel’s shoulders, his strong jaw, and full lips. I was overcome with a feeling of helplessness, sadness, and affection all bundled in a complicated mess of human frailty.
My vision blurred as I slipped out of bed and got dressed. I pressed my fingertips to my lips and touched Axel’s brow before moving to the threshold, my heart clenched like a fist in my chest in pain…and longing.
I shrugged my jacket on, shoved a hand into my pocket, and pulled out a small box. I left it under the tree, tucked toward the back and almost out of sight.
The Christmas morning air had a bite to it. I gently clicked the door shut, and gazed at the layer of frost on the pastures. It was beautiful. You could almost imagine a fat man dressed in red, guiding a sleigh-full of holiday promises onto the dew-covered grass.
I smiled wanly at the fanciful thought. I was too old to hope for help from the North Pole, for Christ’s sake. I was better off wishing on a star.
So I lifted my chin skyward and gave it a shot.
If Christmas wishes were a thing, I’d wish Axel could be mine. I’d wish we could have a shot at forever. I hadn’t wanted to be Rich’s husband, but I’d marry Axel in a heartbeat. I’d love nothing more than to be a family with him and Phoebe.
Improbable and hopeless though it might be, I’d wish for forever.
CHAPTER 16
AXEL
“Daddy! Daddy! Santa was here! Hurry! Mr. Tanner, hurry!”
Phoebe stood in the doorway, bouncing like a monkey in the wild. I blinked awake and sat up, automatically glancing at the empty space where Tanner had slept. The sheets were cold. But he was very conscientious about not wanting to explain an adult sleepover to my five-year-old. He’d probably slipped out of bed to make coffee.
“Santa, eh? Give me two seconds and I’ll be right there,” I said in a sleep-graveled voice.
I put on a plaid flannel shirt and jeans and stumbled into the living area, smiling at Phee’s excitement as she checked tags on the gifts under the tree.
“I have a present for you, Daddy.”
“You do?” I peeked in the kitchen.
No coffee. No sign of Tanner at all.
“Yep. I made it myself. And I made one for Mr. Tanner, too. Where is he?”
I had no idea. “I…don’t know.”
“You don’t know?” she asked with a wisdom far beyond her years.
“Uh…” I dodged the question by turning on the Christmas tree lights and slipping away to make a cup of joe.
I checked my cell, but there were no texts from Tanner.
Armed with coffee, I returned to the living room and urged Phoebe to dive into her presents. The ballerina doll she’d asked Santa for, a few books, a paint set, and a brand-new bicycle with training wheels that I’d used an entire roll of wrapping paper to cover. Her excitement reached maximum peak levels with every rip and tear. She wanted to play with the doll, read her books, paint a picture, learn how to ride a bike…everything all at once.
Chuckling, I scooped her in my arms and tickled her. “Merry Christmas, sweet girl. How about if we get dressed and go see Hazel and her calf?”