Total pages in book: 95
Estimated words: 92067 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 460(@200wpm)___ 368(@250wpm)___ 307(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 92067 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 460(@200wpm)___ 368(@250wpm)___ 307(@300wpm)
“I don’t think I’m equipped to do that at the moment,” I argue and for some strange reason, his face that was taut with emotion softens and he smiles.
He reaches out and puts some of my hair behind my ear. “You’re the strongest person I’ve met. I think you can handle it. In fact, I know you can.”
I take a breath that somehow shudders through me. There are vehicles on the main road passing us, but they fade away as I stare into his eyes. King thinks I’m strong. I think I even see pride in his eyes. This man knows all my dirty secrets and instead of running away and never speaking to me again, he’s remained a friend and helped me to survive. I don’t know what all this means, but I know that if he thinks I’m strong, then I’m somehow going to find a way to live up to what he sees in me.
“Hit me,” I invite, hoping I hide the terror I’m feeling.
“I like you, Gabby. I like the way you shine a light into my world when I’m around you. I love the way you make me laugh. I love that you and I can talk about anything from Etta James to seventies porn and do it in a way that is natural, fun, and hilarious.”
“Just a small point here. I think it may be illegal to mention the goddess that is Etta James in the same sentence as seventies porn.”
“Duly noted.” He laughs, and despite my fear, I find a smile. His hand comes over mine and he stops me from wringing my hands. “I don’t know where this thing between us is going to go. I know you have a lot of healing to do. I know you’re not ready. I also don’t know what I’m equipped to give right now. All I’m asking is that we give us time to see what there is between us.”
“What there is between us?” I squeak, pretty sure I know what he’s saying but needing him to make it really clear.
“Tell me you don’t feel what’s between us. Straight up, Gabby. If you don’t, then I will pull back. I’m not pressuring you. No matter what happens between us, I don’t want to lose you in my life. I will be here for jellybean, and I will always find a way to be here for you. That’s my promise to you, and I mean that shit.”
“Okay,” I reply, because that sounds good. Really good. I can’t imagine not having King in my life. The last couple of days with him have been the best in my life. That’s not even an exaggeration. I feel more me when he’s around. I don’t feel empty or dirty. I feel … almost normal. He’s still holding my hands, so I give him a squeeze.
“Okay, what?”
I bite my bottom lip. I know what he wants me to say. I’m not sure I can give him that.
“King, I’m moving to Denver.”
“Bullshit.”
“It’s not!” I argue, feeling close to panic again.
“How about we give this time to see what’s between us? If it works out, you try staying here with me. If you’re unhappy, but we’re still good, I’ll go with you.”
“I … You can’t be serious. Why would you move to Colorado? Everything you love and know is here!”
“Gabby, if things work out between us, everything I love is right in front of me right now.”
“I think that hit the scale on freak outs that are allowed in one night,” I tell him.
“Just one more thing.”
“King,” I beg.
“Just admit you feel this pull between us, too. If you can do that. We’ll take it slow and see where we’re at by the time jellybean is born. If you can’t do that, then all of this is just on my part, and I’ll deal with that. You won’t feel the burn of it. I won’t allow you to.”
I believe him. King would keep on being here for me. Even if it hurt him, he’d still do it. I want to lie to him. It would be better for him. His family will never accept anything between us. There’s a big chance that he’ll regret anything and everything that happens, because I’ll never be whole enough to give King what he deserves. The only thing is, I never want to lie to King. I never want to lie to anyone again. I don’t want to slip off the road that I’ve started on. So, instead of doing what every instinct I have is telling me to do, I look up at King and give him three little words that I know—I freaking know—will change my life forever.
“I feel it, too.”
I watch as relief floods his features. He leans down and presses his lips to mine. It’s a closed mouth kiss. He doesn’t push for more. Yet somehow, in just that simple lip touch, it’s more potent than anything I’ve ever felt before.