Total pages in book: 149
Estimated words: 142866 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 714(@200wpm)___ 571(@250wpm)___ 476(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 142866 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 714(@200wpm)___ 571(@250wpm)___ 476(@300wpm)
“I try to.”
“Good.” She picks up her fork and stabs a piece of baked chicken, by order of Dr. Katz reducing her intake of fried foods. “My baby girl went and got her a rich man. Lucky Hendrix.”
“I’m the lucky one.” I glance up to smile and then resume eating.
“Hendrix hasn’t brought many boys home.” She snorts. “I know my daughter. I know it’s not because she didn’t have any, but she didn’t see fit to bring many of them around. So you must be special.”
“I hope so. She’s certainly special to me.”
“Did she tell you ’bout me and her daddy?”
The smile freezes on my face at her words, and I weigh my response carefully. I know how rare it is for Mrs. Barry to discuss Hendrix’s father, and that often when she does, it’s in a fugue of confusion.
“Just that you met really young,” I say after a moment.
“Knew each other since we were kids.” Mrs. Barry chuckles. “I couldn’t stand his big head.”
“Why not?” An involuntary smile tugs at the corners of my mouth.
“He thought he was hot stuff.”
“Was he?”
“Oh, yeah, but he didn’t have to act like it.” We laugh together for a little bit before she continues. “He was good-looking and smart. Played football.”
“Ahhh. Had some swagger, did he?”
“Lots of it. He walked right up to me and said, Betty, it’s gon’ be you and me.”
“And what’d you do?”
“Kicked him in the shin.”
Our laughter mixes in the otherwise quiet kitchen again before we move on.
“How’d he win you over?” I ask.
“His mama had this beautiful garden. We had a contest every year for prize flowers. Her ranunculus won just about every time. They were famous around here. He would bring me one from her garden every Sunday.”
“Like to your house?”
“He’d leave it on my front porch. No note. Just the flower. Everybody knew his mama’s ranunculus. No mistaking them.”
“How long did he do that?”
“Two years.” She chuckles and it’s a little raspy, slightly hoarse with emotion. “One Sunday we were in tenth grade, he showed up with his flower, ready to leave it, and I was sitting on the front porch.”
“No way. And what did you say?”
“I said There’s a dance at school next week. Wanna go?”
I sputter out a laugh. “After two years, just like that?”
“Just like that.”
“What changed your mind?”
“I don’t know that my mind needed changing. I think I knew in eighth grade he was it for me, too, which I know sounds strange. We both had some growing up to do. You know girls are always more mature than boys. Sometimes things just need to be proved out. Even at that age, he showed me and he showed me till the day that he…”
Her words wither and sorrow clouds her eyes. I’ve seen this look on my father’s face a hundred times. Are there words in the lexicography of human emotion for how it feels to lose the love of your life? It’s articulated in wails and tears, in the impenetrable loneliness that comes with losing such a vital part of who you are. Your person, closer than anyone to you, is now irretrievable, beyond reach. A mourning with no sunrise. You never know what to say when faced with that kind of devastation. I’ve learned to say nothing at all. No platitude or condolence could make it any better. All I can do is be human enough to listen and try to understand. After a moment, Mrs. Barry walks to the kitchen window, folding her arms and contemplating the chaos of foliage and weeds out back.
“That was our garden,” she says wistfully, and aims a smile over her shoulder that’s just like Hendrix. “It was full of ranunculus.”
“Did you ever enter any of those floral contests?”
“No.” She grabs a paper towel and blows her nose. “They were just for him and me. I haven’t had the heart to get out there in…” She bunches her brows like she’s concentrating, maybe trying to remember, before she shakes her head and nods to the backyard. “He’d probably say, Now Betty, you know that’s a shame. Got my garden looking like that. Get on out there, girl.”
“What’s stopping you?” I ask softly.
Her smile slips and her eyes drift back to the window. “I guess nothing at all.”
CHAPTER 43
HENDRIX
There used to be lots of laughter in this house. Less so of late, but it still sounds familiar drifting from the kitchen. Freshly showered, I flatten my back to the wall and eavesdrop on the conversation between my mama and my boyfriend.
Boyfriend.
I let that word boing around the bouncy house in my head for a second.
I have a boyfriend. A lover. A guy. A person.
My stomach growls and the smell of Mama’s collard greens and mashed potatoes and baked chicken reminds me I skipped breakfast, too. I had an early London call before I screwed Maverick in my dad’s old office.