Total pages in book: 72
Estimated words: 70630 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 353(@200wpm)___ 283(@250wpm)___ 235(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 70630 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 353(@200wpm)___ 283(@250wpm)___ 235(@300wpm)
“It kind of sucks.”
“But you wrote it for me.” When I looked up, Connor avoided my gaze.
“Well, yeah. I just thought… I didn’t know if you’d listen to me if I tried to talk to you. But you like poems. I mean, you like good poems, and that isn’t one but—”
“It’s the best poem I’ve ever read.”
Connor frowned, obviously not buying it.
“It’s the only poem anyone’s ever written just for me and it… it means there’s a chance for us.”
“I told him,” Connor said.
“Told who?”
“Mario. I told him I was gay.”
Hope fluttered in my chest. “You did?”
Connor nodded.
“How did he take it?” I asked.
“Not well, but not as badly as he could have.”
“Are you okay?” He was here at least. He hadn’t decided his time with me had been a mistake.
“Yes, but I’d be better if…”
I grew impatient for him to continue. “If what?”
“If you were going to stay.”
My heart fluttered. There really was a chance. Don’t screw this up. “I was going to leave. I was going to give up on you, on us, but now…” I swiped at my embarrassingly wet eyes.
“I… I don’t really have the right words, but I thought maybe if I tried to change. Maybe then you’d get it. Maybe you’d understand how much I want you to stay. Sell the house if you really want to, but please don’t run. Give me a chance.”
I sucked at making emotional declarations, but I had to say something. “I don’t know that I could have accepted the offer, even if you hadn’t shown up. I love this house. As crazy as it may be for me to live here alone, once I realized that all the bad memories weren’t dragging me down, I didn’t want to sell it. I do want to travel, but I want you more.”
Connor gave me a huge smile, and I knew I’d said the right thing.
“I love this house too and I… I love you,” Connor said.
I couldn’t believe what I’d just heard. “Y-you do? I didn’t think… I mean, I knew you cared but… Oh God, I think I’ve loved you since the day you first touched me. The day you were…”
“Freaking out?”
“Struggling with your past. Connor, I’ve never thought—”
He held up his hand. “I made an appointment for next week with the therapist Sabrina recommended. The one who inspired her to become a therapist too.”
“That’s fantastic.”
“So you’re really going to stay? You really turned the job down?”
I nodded. “I did. And now that I know you feel as strongly about me as I do about you, I’m going to stay right here. I’ll write my book and then… I don’t know. I’ll figure it out. I’ll still make some travel plans, but maybe you could come too and… No, that’s crazy.”
“What is?”
“I was about to ask you to move in, but you—”
Connor
I couldn’t wait for Jeremy to finish his sentence. “Yes.”
“Yes?” Jeremy’s stunned expression made me laugh.
“Yes, I’ll move in with you.”
“Really?” He beamed, looking so boyish and adorable.
I started to pull him into a kiss, but my phone chimed, ruining the moment. “That’s Mario’s ring. I’m sorry, but I have to answer.”
Jeremy nodded as I pulled the phone from my pocket. “Hello.”
“Don’t ever hide anything from me again, you got that?” Mario said.
“I—”
“I’m so pissed at you right now, but I couldn’t… Fucking hell, I couldn’t leave without calling you back, you bastard.”
Mario hadn’t expressed that much emotion since he’d rescued me. “Wait, you’re mad at me because I hid that I was gay, not because—”
“I hate that you like dick. I wish… Are you sure you don’t like women, not even a little?”
I grinned. He wasn’t going to stop talking to me. He wasn’t shutting me out. “I’m sure.”
Mario snorted with disgust. “I don’t get it, but you fucking saved me, man, and I… I can’t hate you, no matter what you put in your ass.”
“Wait. You think I’m a bottom?”
He started laughing. “I bet you love it.”
“What the fuck? I—” I glanced at Jeremy. I had loved it, but I loved fucking him too. “I like a lot of things.”
“Gross,” Mario declared.
“You don’t have to like it, but you can’t talk shit about gay guys in front of me if we’re going to stay friends.”
He huffed. “I still don’t think it’s right, but goddamn it, I want you to be happy.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “I want you to be happy too.”
Mario laughed, but he didn’t sound amused. “I don’t think that’s likely, but at least there’s hope for one of us.”
“I love you. You know that, right?” I asked.
“You too.” He ended the call then, obviously not willing to talk any more about himself.
“Everything okay?” Jeremy asked as I put my phone away.
“Yeah, I think it is. Fuck. I can’t believe it. He was angrier that I’d hidden it from him than anything else. He’s not happy, but he’s not going to push me away.” I pulled Jeremy to me, and we held each other, soaking in the comfort we’d missed.