Total pages in book: 74
Estimated words: 71396 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 357(@200wpm)___ 286(@250wpm)___ 238(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 71396 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 357(@200wpm)___ 286(@250wpm)___ 238(@300wpm)
She goes still but I can see the confusion on her face. I never gave her any such indication, claiming my need to focus on racing made a relationship impossible, and I know that’s got to be a shocking revelation.
“But?” she prompts.
“But I knew I couldn’t be what you needed,” I say. “I was grinding every second to get noticed. I’d just transitioned from rally to FI3, which was a risky move. Every day was either racing or networking or breaking my neck to find sponsorship money. I was traveling, you were stationary. I was afraid I’d hurt you if I tried to do both and honestly, I couldn’t afford not to take the shot in racing. I really wanted to build something with you, and didn’t like the idea of putting you second. As we stand here right now, I’m having all kinds of regrets.”
She offers me a sympathetic smile. “You were right to do that. I’m not sure I really understood it to that level back then. I mean, you said you had to focus on racing, but part of me thought maybe you just… didn’t want me.”
“I’ve always wanted you,” I say without hesitation. “Want wasn’t the problem.”
She tilts her head, studying the cityscape. Her tone is heavy with regret. “Then why did I end up with Lance?”
I hate the self-loathing I hear in her voice, but I can’t answer that. Not without sounding like I’m asking for something she’s not ready to give.
But she answers for me anyway.
“I think part of me wanted something simple. Familiar. I knew Lance as well as I knew you and he made it easy in the beginning. Charming, predictable. And it felt… safe.”
“You were close to him too,” I admit. That made it easy for her to get ensnared by my brother.
She nods. “Not in the way I was with you. But yeah. It wasn’t out of nowhere.”
There’s a pause. A long one.
“Maybe I settled,” she says. “Maybe I convinced myself that I could make that version of love work. That it was good enough.”
I don’t say anything, instead trying to ignore the flare of jealousy that rages through me that she loved Lance at one point.
She looks at me. “It wasn’t good enough for me.”
I slide my hand behind her neck, squeezing gently. “So are you sure that you don’t regret last night?”
She shakes her head. “No. Do you?”
“Not for a second.”
A soft smile pulls at her lips. “Then we don’t have to define it yet. We just… figure it out.”
“It’s a lot to figure out but I’m up for the challenge,” I say before brushing my mouth over hers.
There’s a knock on the hotel suite door.
“Did you order room service?” she asks.
“No,” I say, on alert wondering if somehow Lance found out where I’m staying. Lara follows me off the balcony through the suite but stands back as I check the peephole.
Fuck.
It’s Lara’s parents, Colin and Margot. I knew they were driving in last night so they could experience all of race day, but it’s bloody seven o’clock in the morning. I look over my shoulder and mouth the words, “It’s your parents.”
Lara’s eyes widen as she clutches the robe tightly at her throat. Her gaze flicks to the room we shared last night and then she wisely darts to the room she’s been using.
I take a deep breath, paste on a smile and open the suite door. Luckily, I’d donned a pair of shorts and a T-shirt after exiting the bed this morning. “Hey… wow. You’re up early.”
Margot beams. “Good morning! We figured we’d swing by before the race and knew you’d be up. Wanted to wish you luck today and I just need to give my daughter a hug.”
I step back and make a welcoming sweep, touched at how much Lara’s parents love her. “Of course… come on in. I think Lara’s getting changed. I heard her moving around a bit ago. Want some coffee?”
“Please,” Margo says as she goes to her tiptoes to brush a good-morning kiss on my cheek. I shake Colin’s hand.
By the time I’ve got three cups of coffee made on the fancy machine this suite affords, Lara emerges in leggings and a hoodie, barefoot but composed.
“Mum… Dad,” she says brightly, eyebrows high in faux surprise. “What are you doing here?”
“Hope we didn’t wake you,” Colin says, wrapping his daughter in a hug before she moves to Margot for the same.
She grins. “Not at all. We were up early.”
My eyes cut to her. We?
Her voice is calm. Her expression open.
She’s not hiding this.
But she’s not announcing it either.
Margot hands Lara a little velvet pouch. “I brought you something… just a silly charm I found yesterday in a little shop on the beach. For courage. Figured you could use a bit extra today.”
Lara clutches it like it’s the most precious thing she’s ever been given. “Thank you.”