Total pages in book: 121
Estimated words: 119548 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 598(@200wpm)___ 478(@250wpm)___ 398(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 119548 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 598(@200wpm)___ 478(@250wpm)___ 398(@300wpm)
“Nooo.” Mel clambered onto the chair on the other side of the desk, crossed her legs in it, and leant forwards. “What did you do, Fred?”
I waved my hand dismissively and sat back up, reaching for my drink. “You don’t need to know that. But the thought that I could lose her…”
“You haven’t told her, have you?”
I stared at my sister. “When have I been able to do that? This all happened so quickly, then Nana got more unwell, then she died, and Deli was grieving, and…”
“You’re a coward, Frederick Wellington.”
I’d been called many things, but never a coward. “Hey—”
“You. Are. A. Coward.” She slapped her knees on the final word. “You haven’t told her because you’re afraid. Aside from the back it’s glaringly obvious that she’s in love with you, Deli would never be cruel to you for sharing your true feelings, even if she didn’t feel the same way. You’re just a coward who’s using the events of the last few months to justify why you haven’t told your wife and best friend that you’ve fallen in love with her.”
I pressed my lips together.
I wanted to argue, but her words stung with the essence of truth. “I didn’t want to overwhelm her,” I muttered into my glass. “It might be obvious to you, but I didn’t really consider it until tonight.”
Mel stared at me, saying nothing. Her eyes were full of judgement and screamed out her earlier words: that I was a coward.
“I’m going to tell her, all right?” I put the glass down with a clunk. “I can’t go back to before, Mel.”
“Why aren’t you telling her right now then, scaredy-cat?”
“She’s asleep. I tried to tell her tonight, but it wasn’t that simple.”
She blinked at me. “You had sex, didn’t you?”
“I am not discussing this with you.”
“That’s for the confirmation.” She snorted. “About time you two crossed the line. Granny keeps whinging about you pretending in your pretend relationship.”
“If you knew it was fake, why did you think it was real?”
“Because you two act like it!” She leant back in the chair, flinging her hands out. “And not in public when you have to. How many times have I walked in and found her curled up against you watching TV? Or you rubbing her feet? Or Deli drying your hair?”
I said nothing.
“I don’t know why you don’t go and wake her up to tell her you love her right now, to be honest.”
“Because nobody wakes up Delilah and gets away with it,” I replied flatly.
“Good point. I’ll let this one slide.” She paused. “You really do have to tell her, Fred. Now that you know…”
“I’m going to. I swear.” I sank my fingers into my hair and looked down at the papers. “I just don’t think I could survive it if she told me she still wanted to leave.”
After a moment, Mel sighed, then walked around the desk. She perched on the arm of my chair and wrapped her arms around my shoulders, gently leaning on me. “She won’t. You know she won’t. If you know why she wanted to leave, and you’ve done something to fix it, then you just need to talk it out.”
“What if she doesn’t want to? You know Deli tends to run when—”
“She loves you, Fred. She always has. It’s just a different kind of love now. She’s probably just as scared as you are.” She let out a breath with a little huff. “But I know you two. There’s never been anything you haven’t been able to figure out. You trust her more than anyone else. You’re just going to have to trust her a little more right now.”
“But, Mel…” I pressed the heels of my hands into my eyes. “If she still wants to sign these, then that’s it. I’ve lost her in every possible way.”
She squeezed me and gave a light laugh. “Never. That will never happen. I know her just as well as you do, and I can see the way she looks at you. You’d have to be blind not to see that something major has changed in your relationship.”
“I really never thought I’d fall in love with her,” I said, my voice barely above a murmur. “I’ve never felt that way about her, but now I can’t stop. If I lost her, I really don’t know what I’d do.”
“Has it occurred to you, brother dearest, that sitting here feeling sorry for yourself and overthinking achieves absolutely nothing?” Mel said, sitting up straight. “You could just go and talk to your wife and get all the answers to your questions.”
“I know. I just need some time to process all of this. I don’t want to fuck it up.”
“You’ll fuck up far more by staying silent than being honest.” She picked something off the back of my dressing gown. “Silence can be misconstrued. Honesty can’t be.”