Total pages in book: 51
Estimated words: 45957 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 230(@200wpm)___ 184(@250wpm)___ 153(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 45957 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 230(@200wpm)___ 184(@250wpm)___ 153(@300wpm)
Somewhere in my fucked-out brain, I knew I was hitting sub-low. I was familiar with it due to all the times I’d had to take care of a sub when they hit one. But I had no idea it felt like this. So all consuming. That’d easily been the best sex of my entire fucking life, and I was ruining it by becoming a complete mess and sobbing onto Ivan’s bare chest.
“I’ve got you,” Ivan murmured, his face buried in my hair. I vaguely registered him tugging the blankets over us, pulling them over my head and cocooning us in darkness. “You’re safe, kotik. It’s okay. Just let it out.”
I had no idea how long we lay like that for, but eventually, my crying slowed until my tears finally stopped. Sniffling, I tilted my head back to look up at Ivan. He was already watching me, his brows furrowed with concern. My eyelids fluttered closed when he tenderly cupped my cheek and brushed some tears off my red face.
“Sub low?” he asked softly. When I nodded, he tipped my chin up and softly kissed me. It was oddly tender, something I didn’t expect from a man like him, who didn’t seem to be capable of empathizing with anyone. Yet he’d done a damn good job of taking care of me when I’d begun falling apart.
“I’m sorry,” I croaked, my throat raw.
He shook his head. “Nothing to be sorry for, kotik. You’ve never fallen into subspace before, and that was pretty intense for both of us. I should have expected it and taken your first time bottoming for me a little easier. Not made it so intense.”
“I think it would’ve happened either way,” I confessed, closing my eyes and resting my head on his arm. Fuck, I was so drained. I just wanted to sleep. “You make my head quiet.” He stroked his nails along my scalp at that, and it almost felt like a reward of sorts for admitting that to him. I snuggled a little closer, not ready for this moment with him to end. “My head hasn’t been quiet in a really long fucking time, Ivan.”
He pressed a kiss to my forehead. “It can always be like this,” he said softly. “Just trust me and be.” He ran his hand down my spine. “Get some rest, kotik. We have a long day ahead of us tomorrow, and I need you well rested.”
“Are you staying?” I asked quietly, hating how vulnerable the question made me feel.
He snorted. “After I’ve had you naked and crying for me? Fuck yes, I’m staying. You’ll be goddamn lucky if you ever get a moment alone again.”
Honestly… that didn’t seem like such a bad idea anymore.
17
Adrian
I groaned at the sound of my phone ringing and slapped my hand around the nightstand until it landed on the offending device. Ivan grunted and tightened his arm around me, pressing his face between my shoulder blades.
“Shut it off,” he mumbled.
Ignoring him, I squinted at the screen, immediately coming awake at the sign of Emmaline’s name. She’d had my number for years, but she’d never used it.
Something was fucking wrong. I could feel it in my gut. A sense of foreboding slid through my veins as I quickly sat up, displacing Ivan. He huffed in annoyance and squinted at me as I swiped my thumb up my screen to answer her call and raised my phone to my ear.
“Emmaline?” I asked. I scrubbed at my eyes, trying to rub away the grittiness. My eyeballs felt swollen from crying so much. “What happened?”
Her breath hitched, and she sobbed. Propping my elbow on my raised knee, I dropped my forehead to rest on my forearm, trying to brace myself for the news she was about to break to me.
“James was shot,” she croaked. Fuck. “He—” She choked on her next breath. My chest tightened, and I sucked in a shuddering breath. “He’s in surgery, but they don’t—” Her next sob broke my already fracturing heart. “They don’t know if he’s going to make it, Adrian.”
“Fuck,” I snarled, flinging the blankets back. I hurried to the dresser, snatching out a pair of jeans. “I’m coming home, okay? Is Darren with you?”
“The whole family is here,” she said, her voice cracking. “I thought—” She had to pause to breathe. I had no idea how she was capable of it when my lungs didn’t feel like they were working properly. My brother, the one man who’d always had my back, was lying on his fucking death bed. “I thought I should be the one to call you as his w-wife.”
I pressed my phone between my ear and shoulder as I tugged my jeans up my legs with shaking hands. “He’s not dying, Emmaline, you hear me? That man will not fucking die if for no other reason that he’s too damn stubborn to leave you, okay? Be strong for him, and be strong for Carter,” I ordered, mentioning her son. “I’ll be home soon.”