Total pages in book: 95
Estimated words: 91490 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 457(@200wpm)___ 366(@250wpm)___ 305(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 91490 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 457(@200wpm)___ 366(@250wpm)___ 305(@300wpm)
When the hot chocolate is ready, I head over to her place with two mugs and knock on her door. I consider purring to get her to open the door, and then remember who the fuck I am.
She answers wearing pajamas. Pajamas with cats all over them wearing different kinds of hats.
“I made you some hot chocolate.”
I wait the couple of beats of silence it takes for her to respond.
“Thanks, Byron.” She takes the cup from my hand, our fingers brushing as I let go of the mug. I feel her warmth course through me. I don’t know if it’s the frigid air or the woman in front of me, but just being near her shifts every atom in my body.
I set my cup down on her porch railing. “Are you mad I didn’t tell you about the Colorado Club?”
Her gaze flashes to mine. “Oh, you mean the part where you’re my boss?” She doesn’t deliver the words with any spite or venom. It’s the resigned hopelessness in her tone that breaks me, and I feel awful.
“If it’s any comfort, I don’t even know who your boss is.”
“Byron,” she says, chastising, and her words echo in my chest.
I hold up my hands. “You’re right, I’m your ultimate boss and I didn’t tell you that. I wanted to be your neighbor. Not your boss. And I wanted to kiss you, and then I didn’t because I…” God, I just rewound fifteen years and became an awkward teenager talking to girls for the first time. What the fuck is the matter with me?
I don’t know why I said it. Why mention the kiss? Except I’ve thought about what kissing her would be like every second since I last saw her. We should both forget about it. Move on. But it’s like there’s a special kind of gravity in her, pulling me toward her. I’m helpless against it. I just can’t step away.
She closes her eyes in a long blink, and I want to pull her close and make everything better. “I need to sleep,” she says. “It’s been a really long day.”
She doesn’t feel the pull like I do. She can’t if she can shut the door.
I nod, accepting her decision. I might not want her to go, but I can’t deny that it’s for the best.
The last thing I need is to have a relationship with a member of the Colorado Club team. The gossip around Star Falls is bad enough, but no doubt it would spread like wildfire around the Club. It wouldn’t work. And if it’s not going to work, then why not cut things short now, when it’s easier to walk away?
I push my hands through my hair. Why am I even thinking about having a relationship? I haven’t even kissed this woman and I’m fast-forwarding. At the pace I’m going in my head, I might propose tomorrow night.
I’m a fucking idiot and I need to get a grip.
I take the steps down from her porch and head back to my cabin. It doesn’t feel good, but walking away is the right thing. It was just a kiss and it will all be forgotten in a few days. I need to keep my focus on my business—the stakes are too high to get distracted.
As I’m climbing the steps to my porch, the door to her cabin opens.
I freeze as she comes out.
“Frank was my boss,” she says. “And he had all the money and power, and I know we just shared a couple of conversations and an almost-kiss. It’s not like we’re getting married or even… having sex.” Her voice skyrockets on the last word. “I just can’t get into that. I can’t have someone be the boss of me like that again. I need to stand on my own two feet and not be so dependent on someone else for… everything.”
My insides curl up, hating that she felt so out of control and dependent on someone else. It’s exactly how I felt when my dad died and I discovered we didn’t own the farm anymore. That the loans were all being called in and we faced eviction. And even then we were left with the grief over a man who should have been a better father and husband. I ran away from Star Falls. She ran to Star Falls. But we both ran looking for the same thing—control over our own destiny.
She doesn’t talk about Frank badly. There’s nothing to suggest he abused his power. But it doesn’t mean it didn’t impact their relationship. I’ve never thought about the effect my money and power have on relationships. Partly because I’ve never been serious about anyone. I’m so thankful she told me—that she didn’t just walk away leaving me with a thousand questions.
“I get it,” I say. “I’m sorry I wasn’t more open with you.”