Total pages in book: 83
Estimated words: 79564 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 398(@200wpm)___ 318(@250wpm)___ 265(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 79564 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 398(@200wpm)___ 318(@250wpm)___ 265(@300wpm)
I know he thinks those are things in his favor, but they’re marks against him.
Those wonderful things make him dangerous.
They make me want to open up to him and take a risk, but that means that I might be willing to get hurt again.
It means I’m getting weak. That I’m falling prey to the same insidious need for someone to want me, just like I did all those years ago, and I can’t have that.
I swore to myself I’d never be that frail of mind again.
Groaning, because this is all so confusing, I roll over and press my face into his pillow. It smells like North, and my body reacts to the masculine scent of his body wash. He’s all man and God help me but that turns me on.
I roll to my back, staring at the ceiling. It doesn’t take much for him to turn me on. It’s not just knowing what he can do to me and trust me… he can make my body sing. But it’s his confidence in himself that makes him so sexy.
It’s infuriating, of course, because he wields it like a weapon, making me forget all about my sworn commitment to avoid… well, commitment.
I blow out a breath as I consider my options.
I could insist on going back to where we were. I stay with Rafferty, see North on occasion and we keep this just as a physical coming together of bodies.
I could keep things status quo. Continue to still have all the sexual benefits, but we also hang together. Go on dates, enjoy each other’s company, have fun as a couple.
Or I could even take it a step further and move into his place. That’s probably the worst idea because that would egg North on to keep hammering at me for more. It would be a win I don’t want him to hold over me.
It would be easiest to keep this focused on sex. It’s the best I’ve ever had in my life, so why not just make that the center of what we have?
“You’re awake.”
I jolt, lift my head and see North standing in the doorway. He presses his hands into the doorframe above his head, causing his shirt to ride up and expose the muscular ridge of his belly. He’s got on a pair of sweats that hang low on his hips.
“I made you some blueberry pancakes. You said they were your favorite.”
Right there.
That’s what scares me. The beautiful effort to do something that shows he cares for me. It’s not about the depth, which, the deeper the scarier, for sure. It’s about the fact he did it and he’s not trying to impress me. He’s doing it because that’s just who he is.
“Get out of bed, sleepyhead. Come eat.”
He turns away and pads into the kitchen while I consider my next move. He’s in control and I have to set the tone going forward.
North’s back is to me when I walk into the kitchen. I watch as he plates blueberry pancakes and I know I should be grateful for the gesture.
But I can’t because that means he’s getting too close, and I can’t afford for that to happen. I need him to remember that what we have is a friends-with-benefits relationship and nothing more. The only way to make him remember that is to show him right this very moment how unimportant blueberry pancakes are to me, and how much I want just him.
Right here. Right now.
In this kitchen.
North senses me, turning to glance over his shoulder, and he finds me standing gloriously naked. My shoulders are back, head held high, and I slowly slide my hand down the center of my chest, over my abdomen to hover just over my pubic bone. His eyes are hot, following that trail, and he drops the plate of food onto the counter with a clatter.
His eyes roam over me hungrily as I saunter closer to him until I can feel his breath across my cheek. I wait for him to say something, perhaps chastisement for ruining his breakfast, but instead he brings a hand to my waist and his fingertips dig in slightly. I shiver under his touch, aching to feel him against me.
With a low growl, North pulls me flush against his body, our mouths crashing together in a violent kiss. It’s all teeth and tongues, passionate and demanding. It’s a hundred miles per hour out of the gate—our normal speed—and I melt into him.
Large hands at my hips push me backward until I come up against the cold ledge of the kitchen counter. Without breaking our kiss, he lifts me up and settles me on the edge. My legs naturally wrap around his waist and I scoot forward so I can grind against the lower part of his belly.
I feel his thick cock through the fabric of his sweats and slip my hands under his T-shirt to glide up his torso. A groan rumbles and he breaks the kiss only to shuck his shirt to give me more access to his skin. I have learned so much about North, but my favorite is that he just loves being touched everywhere.