Total pages in book: 82
Estimated words: 75983 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 380(@200wpm)___ 304(@250wpm)___ 253(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 75983 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 380(@200wpm)___ 304(@250wpm)___ 253(@300wpm)
“Why didn’t you?” Rudy asked conversationally as he waited for me to take another turn.
I couldn’t draw cards endlessly, so I went for a dice roll, which was a way to attack Rudy. Big mistake. Rudy countered with a roll that easily beat mine. He claimed one of my cards in victory, and I frowned.
“The Nutcracker saved my ballet future before it even began. I got cast as Clara’s prince.” I narrowed my eyes, but my gaze left my cards to travel back in time twenty years prior. “My first big part. Tavio was the guest Cavalier, along with Irina as the Sugar Plum Fairy. They encouraged me to stick with ballet, apply for summer intensives, and get serious about my training. I wasn’t convinced until I heard the applause after the first show. For the first time, it seemed like the audience was clapping for me. I was hooked and went home and immediately started looking up the summer programs Tavio and Irina had mentioned.”
“That’s amazing.” Rudy shook his head, short brown hair falling across his forehead. “In middle school, I was mainly committed to my dice collection and various video game consoles, not making career decisions.”
“It’s not a career.” Explaining my worldview and the way my whole paradigm had shifted as a teen to a non-dancer like Rudy was almost impossible.
“Lifestyle. Calling. Avocation. Passion. Any of those work better?” Rudy countered before playing another two cards. “And your move.”
I possessed a card that allowed me to nullify his move, which I did with no small amount of glee.
“Ballet is an identity. A core part of who I am. I get paid to dance, yes, but I am a dancer. Tavio and Irina helped me discover that identity, but in many ways, it was already there.”
“Destiny.” Rudy smiled broadly before his expression dimmed slightly. “I’m still waiting for mine to arrive.”
“You’re young. You have plenty of time.” My tone was similar to the one I’d used earlier with Victoria, but Rudy made a sour face.
“I’m twenty-four. Feels like everyone else has it all figured out by now,” he said softly. Something pinched deep in my chest.
“They don’t.” I shared a rare bit of honesty, matching his low tone as if we were sharing secrets.
“You mean there’s no exclusive adulting club? No hidden manual on how to level up?” Rudy laughed at his own joke. “Man. That blows.”
“I’m sure your destiny will come calling.” Perhaps if I sounded big brotherly enough, I could tamp down the attraction that kept flaring with every small smile and blush of Rudy’s.
“Here’s hoping.” Rudy didn’t sound convinced, so I felt honor-bound to offer more advice.
“Surely you have some dreams. Something in the computer world? Games?” In my very limited experience, techy people seemed to be in demand.
“Game design is a notoriously brutal field. Playing games is something I do with my friends, not to get paid.” Shaking his head, Rudy made a face like I was missing the point entirely. Which, to be fair, I likely was, so I let him continue. “When I was younger, I thought having a husband and being a stay-at-home dad sounded terrific, but no one’s taking applications for that role either.” He waved the hand holding his cards. “It was a silly thought anyway.”
“It’s not silly.” I thought back to my busy childhood and that underused playroom. The sort of person who brought me pillows and board games would be a parent any kid would be lucky to have.
I also liked how easily he’d come out to me. I’d suspected, of course, thanks to those blushes of his, but he didn’t seem at all self-conscious about sharing his identity with me. It had taken me a lot of years to become as open about being pan myself, so I admired his boldness.
“Someday my prince will come,” Rudy said in a singsong voice before turning back to the game. “Your move.”
I wanted to bring back his earlier good mood, so I forced an upbeat tone of my own. “Should I chance another roll of the dice?”
“Go for it.” Grinning, he waggled his eyebrows at me. Yeah, Rudy’s prince and those future kids were going to be lucky indeed.
Six
Tour jeté: a split leap that turns in the air.
Rudy
Today is going to be a good day. Standing in front of the hall mirror near the ballet school office, I gave myself a little pep talk. The sounds of the professional dancers finishing their morning class filtered down the hallway. For once, I wasn’t wearing layers of ill-fitting knitwear and my hair had cooperated. I looked almost professional.
“Are you ready for the school visit?” My mother came up behind me, making me jump. Almost. I was almost a professional, other than the part where everyone kept checking up on me. I had new sympathy for Alexander and how he’d assumed I was spying. Feeling watched was a most unpleasant sensation.