Total pages in book: 77
Estimated words: 72589 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 363(@200wpm)___ 290(@250wpm)___ 242(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 72589 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 363(@200wpm)___ 290(@250wpm)___ 242(@300wpm)
With my best friend, my ride or die, my Steph, the dream I’m never giving up on.
Not today or any other day, not until death do us part.
CHAPTER 19
STEPHANIE
Three months later…
Holy monkey mind…
It’s August again, one year since Tank first wandered into my studio with his scowl, his grunts, and his wounded heart, and changed my life forever. Like last year, I’m teaching at Badgers training camp. But everything else?
Everything else is completely different, including the fact that my brain feels like it’s full of a dozen rabid squirrels, all tugging my thoughts in different directions. I can’t remember the last time I had this much trouble calming my mind during a class.
But then, I’ve never had something like this hanging over my head while teaching, either.
A wonderful, miraculous, kind of scary something…
A life-changing something…
But we’re only twenty minutes into the Badgers’ third class of this year’s training camp, and Coach Lauder isn’t about to let anyone out a second before two p.m. He’s softened since last season—the fact that he’s dismissing the team at two, instead of five, on Fridays is a big shift in a chiller direction—but he’s still a hard ass who demands one-hundred percent focus from his players while they’re on the clock.
He expects the same from his staff, and he has a habit of popping into class to check on the rookies when I least expect it…
Forcing my thoughts back to the present moment, I say, “Remember to let the jaw soften. Keep the back of your neck long. Relax your shoulders. Warrior Two doesn’t live in your neck and shoulders. It’s in your hips, your legs… In your core as you pull the belly in and up, stabilizing the spine. Good. Nice adjustments.”
I move barefoot between mats as thirty-five sweaty hockey players hold Warrior Two, their focus already so much better than our first class on Monday. “Release tension in the places that don’t need to be working. Find effort where it’s needed. That’s a big part of the practice. Embrace that, and it’s going to pay off on the ice in increased endurance and faster reaction times.”
I adjust a new player’s form—Kindred, a transfer from Las Vegas who seems like a sweetheart—with gentle hands, suppressing a yawn as I move to the next student.
For the past few days, I’ve been exhausted.
I’ve been blaming it on the new puppy. Piggie the Pug is the sweetest baby brother to Mr. Sniffles, but he wakes up crying in his crate at least twice a night. I strongly suspect he’s going to end up in our bed eventually—no matter what Tank, Mr. Sniffles, or the dog trainer who insisted crate training would be best for him, has to say about it—but for now, we’re still trying to convince him solo sleeping isn’t a fate worse than death.
But I’m starting to think maybe sleep deprivation isn’t to blame.
Maybe it’s something else….
Something I’m almost scared to hope for, considering we’ve only been trying for two weeks. I’m pretty sure I was only in my fertile window for a day or two there, but sometimes a day or two is all it takes…
The thought makes my heart flutter and my focus shift to the back row, where my man is making yoga look easy.
And sexy.
His dark eyes lock with mine, and that familiar electricity sparks between us. It hasn’t faded a bit. If anything, it’s only grown stronger, more powerful, more essential. At this point, I don’t know what I’d do without him, and I hope I never have to find out.
As I guide the class back into their flow and on to the next postures, my focus remains divided. Part of me is locked in on my students, determined to do everything I can to help them progress in their practice.
The other part is thinking of how far Tank and I have come since this time last year. He’s changed so much. He still has resting grump face, a perpetual five o’clock shadow and that smartass sense of humor that makes me laugh, but at his core, he’s so much softer. More open, willing to let others in, to accept help when he needs it, and to believe he deserves good things.
Good things like a family with the woman he loves, even though I’m still not sure I want to get legally married. I already feel married to Tank. I don’t need a piece of paper from the government to make that real for me.
And I have excellent health insurance, at least as far as pregnancy care is concerned. I made sure to check before I even thought about removing my IUD, not wanting to end up in debt before the baby was even born.
The baby…
Our baby…
God, there’s a serious chance I might lose my mind before I get a chance to take any of the tests I grabbed at the pharmacy on my way to the arena.