Total pages in book: 59
Estimated words: 55458 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 277(@200wpm)___ 222(@250wpm)___ 185(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 55458 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 277(@200wpm)___ 222(@250wpm)___ 185(@300wpm)
“Bullshit,” he growled. “I know what your foster parents meant to you, how worried you were they might send you back, and I know that you want this baby, our baby, to have the perfect life with Mom and Dad, and everything that goes along with that.” Gavin held my shoulders and pulled me close. “I know what it means to you, because it means a lot to me, too, Suzie.”
I shook my head to ward off his words. I didn’t want to hear them, didn’t want to remember how much I’d actually shared with him. “Granddaddy told me all about you, too, Gavin.” I hadn’t meant for the words to sound as combative as they did, but I couldn’t help it. “I get why you need to be out there in the world, doing what you do best. You’re brilliant at what you do, and I won’t take that from you.”
“Who’s asking you to?” His words came out on a growl that was pure animal.
“That’s my point,” I shot back and shrugged away from his touch. “You don’t have to ask, I’m giving you the freedom you want.”
He would never ask because he wasn’t that type of guy. Gavin would be here because that was the right thing to do, but eventually he would grow to resent his new life and the tethers that kept him away from what he loved. His true love.
Without another word, Gavin put his lips on mine, kissing me long and slow. The kisses so languorous and sweet, and hot and hungry, that I could do nothing but submit, to open my mouth and accept his erotic torture. His tongue moved within my mouth like they were meant to be together, as if it was some missing piece of the puzzle. Eventually—too soon—Gavin pulled back with a half-smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.
“I know I fucked up, Suzie Q. I fucked things up in about a million different ways, but I’m here because I want to be. Because the moment I found out you were carrying my baby, being here for you was the only thing on my mind. No other reason. So just, please, let me show you.”
His words were filled with sincerity and anguish, as if he could simply force me to believe him with the strength of his will.
The worst part was that it did sound good and I wanted to believe him, but I was too used to disappointment, too used to hoping for the best only to find the exact opposite. I couldn’t just take him at his word, so instead of arguing about it, I changed the topic.
“How’s the album coming along?”
Just as I knew it would, Gavin’s entire face lit up. His smile was wide, his breath held that rush that came with knowing you were at the top of your game. “It’s done and the label loves it.” He rambled on and on about selling songs and starting on the next album, shining brighter than the Christmas tree in the town square during the holidays. “I’m writing again, and the words and music are flowing.”
I stared at his smile and his handsome face, and only one thought came to me. This is the real Gavin. The artist. The man I loved. This was him deep down in his heart, all the way to his core. The rest was, as Granddaddy Aaron had said, what Gavin wanted to be true, but it wasn’t who he really was.
He was a wanderer. A traveler. A born nomad.
No matter how much Gavin wanted it, desired it, wished it could be different, things were as they were. I shook my head and saw his shoulders fall in disappointment.
“The road, Gavin—that’s where you belong.”
His nostrils flared but otherwise he kept his temper in check. “So, I don’t even get a chance?”
“Of course you do. This child deserves as many people as possible who love them, and when he or she gets here, you can make up your mind then. That gives you time to focus on achieving your goals and living your life, but I can’t—I won’t—start to lean on you, to rely on you to be here for me, only for you to leave again. Another absence that lasts a few weeks or months.”
“That was just one time and it was completely out my control!” His temper rose and I smiled. It was about time.
“Yeah? You were without cell service the entire time these past few months, you couldn’t call? Couldn’t tell me you’d returned home to finish your album? Now I call bullshit.”
“I didn’t know how to say goodbye to you, Suzie.” His voice broke, his eyes looked away, and his shoulders hunched forward.
I believed him. “Goodbye is never easy, Gavin.”
“I screwed up, all right?”
“I know, but I can’t be sure you won’t get scared again and leave without a word for months. You know what it’s like to have disinterested parents—why would you wish that on our child?”