Total pages in book: 78
Estimated words: 75592 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 378(@200wpm)___ 302(@250wpm)___ 252(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 75592 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 378(@200wpm)___ 302(@250wpm)___ 252(@300wpm)
I wanted so badly to believe him. But it was going to be really hard to shut that little voice in my head up.
“Alright.”
“And babe?” he called when I started to move away again.
“Yeah?”
“Just putting this out there. If you want to tell me about all that shit, I’m a good listener.”
With that, he retreated into the elevator and pulled the door closed.
The old part of me—so damaged, so used to mind games and harsh consequences for even the most minor of infractions—wanted to think he was being spiteful in walking away, that he was just bullshitting me and was going to go downstairs and get his dick sucked by someone else after making it sound like he was going to wait for me to want to do it.
The newer part of me—the one who was trying so hard to unlearn all those life lessons that no longer served me—decided that he was leaving me alone to give me time to think on his words, to see how much he meant them.
As I slipped into his bed, listening to the party sounds from the floor below, I did genuinely think he was being honest when he said he only wanted me if I was one hundred percent enthusiastic about it.
And the crazy thing was… I suddenly felt that way. I lay there, pussy aching at the very idea of going down on him, of giving him some of the pleasure he’d given me.
That, well, that was new.
Even if I knew it was probably not smart to let myself pursue it.
As I drifted to sleep, there was one thing I was very clear on, though.
I couldn’t open up to him.
I couldn’t tell him about my past, about the club, about the people inside of it, about the men who made me need to gather only what I could carry and sneak out while everyone was asleep.
It was too risky.
There was too much at stake.
Because if Rook knew everything, there was no way in hell he would go through with marrying me.
Not even if it was fake.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Rook
I wasn’t sure if I’d comforted Tessa or made shit worse by bringing up her fucked-up past.
I mean, no, I had no idea what she’d been through. But everything about how she responded to me—or toward things involving me—made me believe I was on the money about her life prior to Shady Valley involving a fuckuva lot of abuse.
If not physical, then at least mental. And after that whole “I have to” thing, I was pretty sure it was sexual too. Even if she didn’t even recognize that yet herself.
I won’t lie; I wanted to know it all. I wished she would just… walk over, sit down, and spill about everything she’d been through.
But after the party at the club—that I’d left early and crashed in one of the empty bedrooms—I’d woken up to learn that Tessa had already gotten up, eaten breakfast, and headed back to the apartment. According to Coach, who was outside when I went to look for her.
I caught a ride into town with Detroit, who was heading to the gym, and managed to catch Tessa coming out of the bathroom in a towel with another on her head.
“Oh.”
“Sorry,” I said, averting my gaze. “I should have… knocked.”
“On the door of your own apartment?”
“It’s our apartment,” I reminded her.
“I just need a few minutes to get dressed, and I’ll be ready.” At my blank look, she added, “The drug test. We told Nancy we’d go first thing in the morning.”
“Right. Okay. Let me just grab a shower too.”
I’d taken one the night before at the clubhouse, needing a few minutes alone to deal with the frustrated desire that I didn’t want Tessa to know about.
But seeing her in a towel, skin all pink—yeah—I needed another few minutes of alone time before we headed out together.
By the time I came back out of the shower, Tessa was in a pair of cut-off jean shorts that showed off a nice chunk of leg, flip-flops, and a simple white tee.
Still, she was ridiculously fucking gorgeous.
“So how far is this place?”
“It’s about half an hour outside of town.”
“I’m shocked Nancy lets you go that far.”
“Right?” I asked, snorting. “You wanna take your car? Or my bike?”
She whipped around at that, eyes wide.
“We can take the bike?”
That was genuine excitement in her voice. So there was one thing about her former biker club that she did enjoy.
The bikes themselves.
“Yeah,” I said, giving her a smile. “I’ll even let you drive if you want. I’m man enough to ride bitch.”
“No. No, I don’t want to drive. But… you’re sure? What if Nancy is there?”
“Surprisingly, I’m actually allowed to drive. I guess the board didn’t see any reason to restrict that right. I renewed my driver’s and got a motorcycle license. But I don’t drive much. I don’t want to give Nancy a reason to suspend the right.”