Total pages in book: 146
Estimated words: 136425 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 682(@200wpm)___ 546(@250wpm)___ 455(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 136425 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 682(@200wpm)___ 546(@250wpm)___ 455(@300wpm)
“I never said that, Zach.”
“I’m sure you’ll get around to it. Don’t think I haven’t heard it all.” He needed to breathe. He’d gone from terror to a weird high of having his brother actually work with him, to the revelation that none of this was going to work. There was no tender place for him at the end of this. There was horror and death, and that was likely the happiest of outcomes. “When Lacey gets back, we’ll call your parents and get you out of here.”
He started to turn.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Devi said quietly.
He was going to miss her, but right now he couldn’t handle more bile. He felt weirdly fragile, and one more nasty word from the one woman he’d ever really loved might break him. He was sure his father would give him a smack and tell him to be a man, but he couldn’t right now, and he sure as fuck wasn’t going to take it out on her. “Your mom isn’t mad at you. I’m sorry she wasn’t as angry with me as you want her to be, but she’s a pragmatic woman. It would have been difficult for Cooper to get you and Kala out. I made a call. It was the wrong one.”
“I am so fucking angry with you,” she said, her gaze intense as though she was holding something back.
“I know. I’ll leave you alone.”
“I don’t want you to. I don’t… Zach, I don’t know what I want right now beyond going back and not leaving Landon in that restaurant.” Tears filled her eyes. “I could have killed Aunt Eve. I got my cousin kidnapped. I think they did terrible things to her. They wouldn’t have if I hadn’t been stupid and gotten myself caught, and I did it because I was mad at you.”
His heart softened immediately, and he knew this woman was his Achilles’ heel. “I’m sorry.”
“I don’t want your apologies.”
“Baby, what do you want? I’ll give it to you.”
“I can’t go home,” she said with surety. “If I go home, I put everyone in my orbit in danger. I was foolish and not thinking. I was going to show you. I was going to show everyone that I didn’t matter.”
Every word made him ache. “You matter. You matter so much.”
“I understand that you have done a good job of taking the focus off Tasha and putting it on me.”
He stilled. It was like she took a knife to him. He couldn’t quite process the words. He knew they were deadly but…she couldn’t think he did that intentionally.
“Zach, you’re bleeding.”
He was. He was bleeding, and he didn’t care. If he bled out, then it would all be over and he wouldn’t have to worry about it anymore. He’d lived so long in survival mode that the brief time he spent with her had been the best of his life. He had his girl and his brother and a place in a world he loved.
He had none of those things now. Did it matter if he bled out? It would make things easier for everyone he cared about.
“You’re bleeding. Whatever the doctor did you opened it up again.”
He couldn’t. He just couldn’t. He put a hand to his side. Sure enough, there was some wetness. The butterflies had likely come apart when he moved the boxes from the front porch inside. Arthur told him not to pick up heavy things, but he didn’t listen because he wanted everything to be in place when Devi woke up.
“Zach,” she began in that irritated tone that seemed to be the only one she used around him. She reached out and grabbed his arm.
And stopped when she got a good look at him.
Tears slipped from her eyes, and she shook her head. “That’s not fair.”
He was crying. It was dumb and unmasculine, and he likely never would have if he hadn’t done all the therapy Big Tag required. Therapy had done nothing except teach him how much he longed for another life. Unfortunately, therapy couldn’t change his circumstances.
He thought she would walk away, but she moved in, fingers coming up to caress his cheeks, wiping the tears away.
“Not fair,” she whispered and then laid her head in the crook of his neck, and he felt a shudder go through her. Then her arms wrapped around him, careful to avoid his injured side. “I don’t know what to do, Zach. I can’t go back. Not home and not to what we were before, but I also can’t… I can’t stay this mad at you. It’s become everything I am, and I’m hurting people I love because I’m hurt. I’m going to stay hurt if I don’t make things right with you. Be evil. Make it easy on me.”
And just like that he hoped again. Such a dangerous thing to do, but she was in his arms telling him she wanted things to be okay between them. He reached up and stroked her hair, holding her close and ignoring the pain. “I can’t. I know I should let you go, but I won’t do it by being mean to you. I won’t lie again. I promise. I love you, Devi. I love you so fucking much, my sweetness.”