Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 98524 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 493(@200wpm)___ 394(@250wpm)___ 328(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 98524 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 493(@200wpm)___ 394(@250wpm)___ 328(@300wpm)
It was clear she was trying to avoid me. I could only blame myself for that, really. It was not like I’d expected things to evolve into more with Octavia. I wanted what she wanted—something simple and easy that did not sink too deep.
No, I was not looking to be in a relationship or to be committed, but hearing her immediately reject anything even remotely serious between us, before even giving it a real chance, made me wonder if what we were doing was worth it. And maybe that was because a tiny part of me, buried deep down, was open to the idea of us growing closer.
But if we did not grow closer, would she even remember me if I never saw her again? And would I be okay with watching her walk away? What if she went back on her word and ended up with that terrible man, Luther, again? And even if that happened, why did I care so much what she did with her life?
I was definitely thinking too much about it. Truthfully, I was just a lonely man who did not know how to handle this delicate situation with her. If I came on too strongly, she would pull away. If I didn’t come forward at all, she would assume I did not want her around.
This was a hard game to play, so for now, I just followed her lead.
And I guess right now, that was to practice avoiding each other as much as possible and keeping things professional.
Twenty-Six
Octavia
New York City is a bustling beauty that deserves exploring.
Too bad we’d spent most of the day stuck in traffic, trying to make it to our hotel. We’d stumbled into three wrecks before finally making it. By the time we did, it was nearing five in the evening and everyone was starving.
We made our way up to our reserved penthouse suites first to drop the bags off. The two rooms Javier had booked were right next to each other, and each suite had two bedrooms.
“Are you sure you do not want this room to yourself?” Javier asked as I dropped my bag on the floor of one of the rooms.
“Javier, come on. Look at this bed.” I gestured to the enormous king-size mattress. “Aleesa won’t take up even half of that.”
“She can always sleep with me if you want your own space,” he offered.
“It’s all right, I promise.”
“Okay, okay.” He looked at me, eyes going up and down. Not only were they curious, but I noticed a hint of desire too.
I tried not to react to his heated stare. Things had been a bit tense on the plane. First, with Paola giving me the stink eye and being way colder to me than she had been at Aleesa’s birthday party, then with Javier sitting across from me during the flight. I’d felt him looking at me a few times and tried my best to ignore it.
I wasn’t sure what to say to him, so instead of speaking, I dug into my suitcase to pull out my toiletry bag. “I’m gonna freshen up before we eat.”
“Sure.” He nodded and started to turn, shoulders slumping again.
No. This couldn’t be it. We couldn’t keep going like this. It was going to kill me.
“Javier?” I called.
He paused, glancing at me.
“You promised things wouldn’t be weird between us.”
He started to frown, but instead his face softened. With a gut-deep sigh, he walked deeper into the room.
“It is not weird,” he murmured. “I just . . . well, I am not sure what you want from me, Octavia. I do not know how far to take things with you.”
I pursed my lips. Those seemed like such loaded statements.
“Do you even know what you want?” His eyes were gentle but mildly confused. “I just do not want to overstep. That is all. You said you did not want us to get too serious, so I am giving you some space. Plus, you are the one who has been avoiding me and creating this weirdness.”
“I haven’t been avoiding you,” I countered quickly.
He gave me a sarcastic look that said, Really?
Okay. Maybe I had been avoiding him a little. After that conversation with Davina, it had really struck me that there was something more I was feeling for Javier. It wasn’t just lust. We’d only had sex twice—and yes, those two times were incredible—but even before that, I’d felt something.
This something had been deeper and much more intricate, and I think sleeping with him had solidified that somehow. Add onto that the fact that he was so quick to defend and protect me from Luther, and yes . . . I was feeling things for this man that I didn’t want to explore again.
A part of what made me hesitant was that I wasn’t sure I could trust another man after Luther had shown his true colors. How could I like—or even love—another person when I was such a terrible judge of character?