Total pages in book: 401
Estimated words: 390373 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1952(@200wpm)___ 1561(@250wpm)___ 1301(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 390373 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1952(@200wpm)___ 1561(@250wpm)___ 1301(@300wpm)
If our situations were reversed, I would be…terrified.
“I get that you want to protect the people here. I do, too.” Casteel lifted my hand, threading his fingers between mine. “But endangering yourself is not how you do that.”
A knot lodged in my throat. “Then what should I do?”
“You should be asking what we should do,” Casteel said. “The three of us. Together.”
Eyes opening, I twisted back to him. “Is that what you’re suggesting we do?”
“I’m suggesting we at least wait until we receive word from Pensdurth. And that we get as much information as possible before we do anything,” he said, his eyes searching mine. “When I said we go to Pensdurth, I wasn’t talking about the armies. Not that I’m against bringing them. We may need them. But I meant us.”
What went unsaid rang painfully clear. “I wasn’t only thinking of myself.”
“I know.” Casteel’s gaze briefly lifted to Kieran. “We both know that. And, gods, I wish you were thinking of only yourself. Instead, you were thinking of everyone but yourself.”
I ran my palms over my legs and glanced toward Reaver. I could only see the top of his frills since he’d again lowered his head to rest between his forelegs.
“We are Joined. The three of us. We’re protected as long as you are.” Casteel leaned in until only a few inches separated us. “I, more than anyone, know what happens when one believes they can fight alone. They fall. I failed. I cannot stand by and watch you make that same mistake.”
I pressed my lips together and shivered as Casteel closed his hand around the nape of my neck. “We have to do something and soon—before Kolis is restored to full power. If he isn’t already.”
“And what would you suggest we do,” Kieran asked.
My thoughts raced for an answer since I had only considered what I could do. I thought about what they wanted before making a move—knowledge. “We need information, right? More than just what state Kolis is in. We also need to know what kind of forces he’s gathered.” I took a deep breath. “We can get that information right now. Slip in, scout the city, and slip right back out.”
“Poppy,” Kieran started.
I turned to him, and Casteel’s hand slipped away. “I know you don’t like the idea of shadowstepping, but it’s really not that bad.”
“It has nothing to do with that,” he said.
“You said we would be able to sense Kolis if he was in the city,” Casteel stated. “That should be the same for him, right? He will be able to sense us.”
“I…” I sat back. “Yes.” How could I not have even considered that? That kind of mistake was utterly absurd, defied logic, and was nothing short of ludicrous.
“We aren’t doing nothing,” Casteel said. “I know it feels like it, but you know making smart, concise decisions based on fact and not emotion doesn’t equal inactivity. That’s why you didn’t burn a path to Carsodonia when you came for me. You were strategic. We are doing the same thing here. And when we make our move against Kolis, we do so together. That’s how we walk away from this. Together. That’s how we live. And we will.” He squeezed my hand. “Okay?”
The breath I took was shallow as I nodded.
“I want to hear you say it,” Kieran said.
I closed my eyes and gave them what they wanted. I said okay. Not because I felt I had to but because they were right. The three of us did have a better chance at defeating Kolis together. But I had a feeling, and I didn’t know if it was the vadentia or fear, that better wasn’t good enough.
I worried we wouldn’t win.
Even if we managed to live.
CHAPTER 29
POPPY
“Poppy?”
I jerked, tearing my gaze from the glass wall of the bedchamber. I hadn’t heard Casteel—his annoyingly quiet footsteps didn’t help. Who knew how long he’d been standing there? It looked like it had been more than a few seconds since he was leaning against the doorframe.
“You all right?”
“Yes.” At least, I thought so. After eating a late lunch with Casteel, I’d left the dining chamber to wash my hands. I didn’t know why I’d come to this window to stare at the Cliffs.
Again.
“You look beautiful.”
“Thank you.” I met his gaze. “You look quite handsome yourself.”
“Handsome?” He crossed his arms. “That’s all?”
“Mm-hmm.” Truthfully, he was absolutely stunning. Something I was sure he was well aware of. “What do we have planned for today?”
“Nothing at the moment.”
The essence inside me hummed stronger. “I can’t sit around and do nothing.”
“Why? Because you’ll likely try to shadowstep to Pensdurth?”
“No,” I denied.
His brows arched. “Poppy…”
“I won’t,” I said with a sigh. “I told you I wouldn’t.”
He was quiet for several moments. “We won’t be sitting around all day. We’re supposed to start training this evening.”