Total pages in book: 99
Estimated words: 95520 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 478(@200wpm)___ 382(@250wpm)___ 318(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 95520 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 478(@200wpm)___ 382(@250wpm)___ 318(@300wpm)
I want to tell them all to shut the fuck up and allow him to do his job. Throwing a ball is like breathing for Bentley. When it’s time to show up, he will. I know he will.
He’s going to do this for his dad. They don’t know him like I do. I’ve picked up the phone to call him a million times, but I know neither of us is ready.
“I’m fine. You go and enjoy yourself. Don’t rush back,” Mom calls back to me.
“Okay, you sure I can’t bring you anything back?”
“No, I’m headed next door in a bit to sit with Fran for a little while.”
“All right, love you. Tell Mrs. Fran I said hello.”
“Um-hm. She told me you’ve been avoiding her. You need to go over there and tell her hello yourself. She’d love to see you.”
“Yeah, I know. I will,” I say quickly and dip out the door.
I haven’t been able to face Bentley’s mother. It’s hard enough to see the sadness in my own mother’s eyes. Eddy comes over almost every day looking for me. He’s such a sweet kid.
Other than that, I’ve been avoiding all the Coswells. Lauren and Tara have invited me to hang out, but I just don’t feel right. There’s a part of me that wonders if Bentley was right.
Did I abandon him? Maybe there was another way to do this. I shake those thoughts off as I head for my car.
“I had to come all the way home to get you to talk to me.”
I turn to find Erica glaring at me. I gasp and rush to tug her into a hug. I don’t even bother to think about it. I miss her so much.
“I should push you on your ass, but I’ve missed you too much,” she grumbles as we embrace tightly.
“I’ve missed you too.”
“Then why haven’t you been answering my calls?”
“I don’t know. Things ended so messed up with your brother. I was trying to make a clean break.”
“By dumping my entire family and holing up in your mother’s house, not willing to talk to anyone?”
“It’s not like that. I have my reasons for staying in the house. This is my first real venture outside.
“I need to get away for a little while. I need out of my head,” I say.
“Okay, so where are we going?”
“Wait, what are you doing here? I thought you planned to take summer classes.”
“Nope. I hate it there without you guys. I dropped out. I’m thinking this college thing might not be for me. Garret had a great idea. I might travel for a bit.”
“Really?”
“Yup. Mom is warming up to the idea. She wasn’t as pissed as I thought she would be when I told her I dropped out. Actually, it seemed like she was waiting for me to.”
“I’m heading to get something to eat. Maybe a burger and fries and a milkshake.”
She gasps. “Oh, you dirty brat. You were going to go to our spot without me.”
I snicker. “I was going to think about you while there. You would have been in my heart.”
“You look good, Zah. I saw you walking and shit. Have you spoken to Bent?” she asks as we climb into my car.
I take a deep breath and shake my head. I knew this was coming. Today of all days, I don’t want to talk about this.
“I figured. He’s still a mess about you two. He misses you.”
“He hasn’t called me either,” I mutter.
“He’s trying to give you space. He knows he fucked up. Listen, babe. All of us are still fucked up. This is all still so fresh.
“Above Baker and Garret, Dad was Bentley’s best friend. I think he’s a little lost for wise counsel. Especially when it comes to you.
“Add to that being a rookie QB while the world is watching and waiting for him to fall apart. I remember what you told me before you broke up with him and how you felt. I’m not saying to ignore that. I’m saying this is Bentley, at least reach out so he knows he didn’t fuck this up as badly as he thinks he has,” she pleads.
“Can we talk about something else?”
“Sure, I want you to come travel with me.”
***
An hour later and my head is still buzzing from Erica’s words. I want you to come travel with me. I came back home to be close to my mom.
I don’t know that I want to go running off when she needs me. However, I still haven’t figured things out. Traveling the world has a nice ring to it.
My father left me a nice trust fund that would allow me to go without having to worry about my finances. I had been looking at a few online courses that would allow me to finish my degree.
Maybe some time out of the country will allow me to heal instead of sitting in a house full of haunting memories.