Total pages in book: 40
Estimated words: 37636 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 188(@200wpm)___ 151(@250wpm)___ 125(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 37636 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 188(@200wpm)___ 151(@250wpm)___ 125(@300wpm)
That's why when he came to me and asked me to marry him two weeks ago, I ended up making the biggest mistake of my life.
I said no.
When I should've said yes.
I need him back, Anah. And I believe he needs me back, too. He loves me still. He would never have stayed with me all these years if he didn't love me. After everything I did, he still stayed with me, and didn't you ever wonder why that was?
It's because he loves me.
So if you really love him and want Ethan to be truly happy, please don't make it hard for him. Please don't make him choose. Please let him go so he can be happy with me.
And so every night, Anah still cried herself to sleep. Cried out loud, cried until exhaustion overcame her. Cried so much that she always hoped once morning came, she would be all out of tears.
But she wasn't.
And so it started again.
She went to work. And she would be crying inside. Just endless tears that her heart couldn't stop shedding. And it hurt, the pain so unimaginable that she almost wanted to go crawling back to Ethan.
Can't it be me?
Please.
Can't it be me?
But she couldn't. Because she loved him. She couldn't go to him because she loved him, and wasn't that the greatest, most painful irony of all? That for the man she loved to be happy, she had to stay away?
ANOTHER DAY BEGAN. Anah paused for a rare moment to study her reflection in the mirror. I lost weight, Anah thought, and that wasn't good. Someone who knew Ethan might see her and tell him, and then he'd be worried, and he'd have to pretend—-
Tears pricked her eyes.
That was what had hurt most of all.
That he had told her he was happy.
And she had believed in his lie.
The tears started falling, but she hastily wiped them away. Stop it, Anah. She grabbed her backpack, slung it over one shoulder, and left her apartment.
But the tears still kept falling.
Stop it, Anah.
She walked furiously down the block in a silly attempt to outrun her memories. But just with all the other days she had done the same thing, it didn't work at all. It never did, and the tears...
I'm happy.
Ethan's raw voice played in her mind.
Oh God.
And the tears became too much.
Blinding her gaze. Choking her. And her heart became so, so tight—-
Oh God.
Her steps jerked to a halt.
Pain had immobilized her, and even as the people around her began to curse, bumping into her, shouldering past her and even shoving her out of the way, she just couldn't make herself move, the pain so devastating that all she could do was cry.
Just one last cry, she promised herself feverishly, and then she'd forget him.
She squeezed her eyes shut.
Just one last cry.
A heaving sob rocked her body at the thought of permanently saying goodbye to the only man she had ever loved.
Just one last cry.
But when she opened her eyes, the first thing she saw was him.
An illusion, Anah thought dazedly. He had to be an illusion.
Beverly Hills was crawling with paparazzi, and it was precisely for this reason she had come straight here to work and find herself again. This was the one place that Ethan could still be recognized, the one place that even Guilia herself hadn't been able to make him step a foot in.
So this Ethan walking towards her—-
He had to be an illusion.
Just had to be, with the way he looked so agitated. He hadn't even seemed this agitated when she told him about Guilia fighting for her life after an accident.
So it had to be an illusion.
And yet—-
When this fake Ethan finally came up to her, she still found herself drawing her breath. So close, she thought painfully. Oh God, this fake Ethan was so, so close, that she had to curl her fingers into fists just to resist the urge to reach up and touch him.
"Anah."
Her head shot up.
"Ethan?"
And fake Ethan...turned out to be real as he hauled her close.
Ethan.
He was real.
He was here.
But if he was...then he wouldn't be happy anymore.
Anah started struggling, but the arms around her were immovable as steel, and those who tried to shove them out of the way only ended up bumping straight into a brick wall and stumbling back.
"Get a fucking room, damn you."
Ethan bent his head and whispered to her ear, "Shall we?"
Anah answered him by beating his chest with her fists.
"L-Let me go."
He tucked her head under his chin even as she kept trying to get out of his embrace.
"People are starting to stare."
"Then let's go somewhere private—-"
A broken cry escaped her, and the sound nearly ripped him into pieces.
"Please." Anah could barely speak past the tears. "Please just let me go—-"
"I can't."
His voice...oh God, his voice...sounded exactly like the time he lied to her about being happy, and the realization killed her, and she almost sagged against him. "Stop p-pretending—-"