Total pages in book: 52
Estimated words: 47822 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 239(@200wpm)___ 191(@250wpm)___ 159(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 47822 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 239(@200wpm)___ 191(@250wpm)___ 159(@300wpm)
I took a breath. “To answer your question, I feel small in a good way.” I smiled, unsure if they could actually see my expression in the darkness. The moon peeked out from a wisp of cloud, giving us a little light, but I found not being able to see them both clearly might help me get this out. “Like all my problems are too tiny to matter in all that vast, open sky. But also like I’m too tiny to matter. And I’m OK with that. I am who I am and I really like myself. But I can’t…” My voice broke. As big of high as I’d been riding all day, the crash was going to be equally big. “I know I’m overthinking this, but your grandmother told me when faced with a difficult situation it’s always best to --”
“Manage expectations.” We all spoke the mantra in unison. Then we were all silent.
“OK, then. I can see this is advice she doled out often.” I tried to laugh but it came out more than a little strained.
Byte stood and held out his hand to me. “Come inside, honey. We’ll light a fire, sit at the table, and lay it all out.”
“Nothing happens tonight, River.” Crush spoke softly and stayed seated. He was the larger of the two and could be the most intimidating. “We’re just going to talk. No matter what.”
I nodded, the relief bigger than I thought it would be. “I guess I hadn’t realized how much this had been hanging over me. Mainly because I’m not really sure what this is.”
“We’ll figure it out together, River.” Crush stood slowly and stepped away from me to open the sliding door.
Looking down at Byte’s hand, I knew my life was about to change. I also knew, for better or worse, I was committed to seeing where this led.
I reached out and slid my hand into his. Byte grinned down at me, like he was proud. I felt that small praise right down to my very soul. The adrenaline and caffeine high I’d been crashing from mere seconds ago got a lift with that look. I was terrified of what was about to happen. I was also rushing straight to it with no regrets.
God help me.
Chapter Seven
River
The fire crackled in the hearth, sending shadows dancing across the cabin walls as I sat on the edge of my seat at the table where we’d gotten drinks and gathered for this discussion. The table was square, so I sat across from Crush with Byte on my right. I felt the weight of my stupid, runaway emotions pressing down on me. I needed to say this, to set boundaries before whatever was happening between us went any further. And at this point, I honestly had no idea what that was. My heart hammered against my ribs as I gathered my courage.
Crush leaned back in his chair, his face half hidden in shadow, while Byte slouched over the table with his forearms resting on the smooth surface. His intense gaze fixed on me like a predator might focus on his prey. The contrast between them was striking -- one all coiled tension, the other open curiosity -- yet they moved through the world as a single unit. It was easy to see how they depended on each other, and I respected that. If I had a sister, I’d want to be as close as Byte and Crush were.
“We’re listening, honey,” Byte said, his voice gentle in a way that made my chest ache. He wasn’t amused now. Byte was as serious as I’d seen him thus far. Crush nodded his encouragement at me when I looked at him. They seemed to have infinite patience and I felt more than a little self-conscious. If I had read the situation completely wrong, I was fixing to make a fool out of myself.
I shifted in my seat, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear for what felt like the hundredth time. My fingers trembled slightly so I laced them together tightly in front of me and cleared my throat. “First of all, if I’m being an ass and thinking more of myself than I should, stop me before I humiliate myself further. OK?” I tried to chuckle at my own expense, but it came out nervous and unsure at best.
Byte gave me a gentle smile. “You’re not going to humiliate yourself. I think we were both giving out some strong signals.”
“Just say what you need to, River.” The gentleness in Crush’s voice was the tipping point for me. “We’re not here to judge you in any way. Byte’s right. We were both comin’ on pretty strong. The last thing either of us want is to make you uncomfortable. Always, River, the most important thing for us is for you to understand you’re completely safe with us. Body and mind.”