Total pages in book: 51
Estimated words: 47597 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 238(@200wpm)___ 190(@250wpm)___ 159(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 47597 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 238(@200wpm)___ 190(@250wpm)___ 159(@300wpm)
"Then I accept. I'll move in with you."
"Yeah?" His eyes light up with hope.
"Yes."
"Fuck," he growls, pulling me into his arms. His lips come down on mine in a drugging kiss that sets me on fire.
I pull back from it, dazed. "You didn't let me finish."
"Knock yourself out then," he says, grinning at me.
I open my mouth, but I'm not sure where to start. So I start with the obvious. "I love you."
"Christ," he groans, pulling me even closer. "You going to say that to me while I'm inside you tonight?"
"Jareth! Your dad is right there."
"He's too busy listening to Bastian complain to hear a word we're saying. Answer the question."
"Maybe."
The heat in his eyes scorches me.
"I'm sorry for being a mess and taking so long to say it."
"Don't."
My brows furrow.
"Don't apologize to me for being who you are, Zoya. I fucking love you exactly how you are." He presses his forehead to mine. "I'd have waited a lifetime if that's how long it took you to decide you were ready."
"I don't want to be the thing that breaks us," I admit softly. "I don't want my fears to be the thing that pushes you away. I have no idea what I'm doing, but I know I don't want to lose you. I just want…you."
"You have me, baby."
"I know. But you asked what I was afraid of this morning, and I want to tell you." I expel a breath when he nods for me to continue. "I'm afraid that I'm going to fuck everything up and lose you. I'm afraid to trust myself. I've never been good at that, Jareth. I didn't want love, so I never learned to listen to my heart. Now, it's screaming at me and I'm just…terrified that I'm going to do it all wrong. I'm afraid you'll get tired of chasing me, and you'll walk away. And I'm really afraid that I'm going to crack once I leave."
"Zoya," he says softly.
I hold my hand up because I'm not finished. "But I've been so stressed about fucking it up and losing you that I've been fucking it up all along anyway. I've done all the wrong things instead of just learning to listen." I meet his gaze. "I don't want to do that anymore, Jareth. I just want to be with you."
Love happens, but you have to choose to let yourself feel it. You have to choose to embrace it and every messy part of it, every single day. That's part of what makes it beautiful. We can ignore it. We can pretend it isn't happening. We can run from it. But the only thing that does is stifle and kill it.
I don't want to be the reason this thing between us dies, not when it's the best thing in my life. Not when he's the best part of every day. So I'm choosing him. I'm choosing us. And if choosing him means letting go of my fears and worries, then I'm letting go.
At the end of the day, it really is that simple.
"You think I don't know that you're afraid to listen to your heart?" He shakes his head, smiling gently. "I know, baby. Believe me, I know. You've been running from the possibility of love for so long that it's an instinct with you now. But it doesn't matter how far you run. It doesn't matter how big of mess you make or how many times you fuck up or what wild shit you do, you aren't going to break us. You can't break this." He touches my cheek, so much emotion in his eyes, it chokes me. "I will never stop chasing you. I'm yours, princess."
I smile up at him through tears. "I'm yours, too, Jareth. Every damn piece of me is yours."
"Fuck," he whispers, emotion flaring in his eyes. He scoops me up into his arms with a groan, his lips coming down on mine in a wild kiss. I cling to him, kissing him back with everything in me. And for the first time, fear isn't beating at me. It's completely silent.
"I love you," I whisper against his lips.
"We're leaving," he shouts over his shoulder, earning laughter from his dad and Ridley. Bastian just sighs before chuckling.
"I thought you had to work?"
"Fuck work," he practically snarls, already stalking toward the stairs with me clutched to his chest.
I bury my face in his throat, laughing quietly.
Chapter Thirteen
Jareth
"Say it again," I growl, my thumb against Zoya's clit as she writhes beneath me.
"I love you."
I groan, slamming into her hard enough to scoot her up the bed an inch. That isn't what she's supposed to be saying…but I fucking love hearing it anyway. "Say the other thing," I demand, nipping at her shoulder.
"Your grape is amazing."
I bury my face in her throat, laughing.
Her soft giggle hits me right in the heart. Christ, I'm not going to survive without her. I already know I won't. I'm trying like hell to keep it together because I know how anxious she is about leaving, but I'm hanging on by a thread.